Family Law
5 minutes reading time

Divorce Counselling and Mediation: A New Chapter

Written by:
The Tabuchi Law Team
Published on:
The Tabuchi Law Team
November 13, 2023
The Tabuchi Law Team
November 13, 2023

In the often-turbulent sea of divorce, counselling and mediation stand as lighthouses, offering guidance and safe passage. For Ontario residents facing the end of a marital journey, these resources are not just optional; they're essential tools for navigating the complexities of divorce. From the rough waters of high-conflict situations to the smoother shores of uncontested separations, understanding the legal and emotional aspects of divorce mediation and counselling is crucial.

This guide dives into the life-altering power of these approaches, highlighting how they can turn a potentially adversarial process into an opportunity for growth and new beginnings.


What is Divorce Mediation?

Divorce mediation is a process in which a neutral third party, known as a mediator, helps couples reach an agreement on the terms of their divorce. The mediator does not take sides or make decisions for the couple. Instead, they help the couple to communicate and negotiate effectively.

Benefits of Divorce Mediation

Divorce mediation offers several benefits, including:

  • Reduced conflict and stress: Mediation can help couples to resolve their differences peacefully and constructively. This can reduce friction and anxiety for the couple and their children.
  • More control over the outcome: In mediation, the couple controls the terms of their divorce agreement. This is in contrast to a court-ordered divorce, where a judge will make decisions on behalf of the couple.
  • Lower costs: Mediation is typically less expensive than a court-ordered divorce.
  • Faster resolution: Mediation can often help couples resolve their divorce more quickly than a court-ordered divorce.

Online Divorce Counselling

Online divorce counselling in Ontario is a modern way to get support when divorcing. It's like having a helpful chat but over the internet. You can talk to a counsellor from home or anywhere you feel comfortable. It's convenient, especially if you're busy or live far from a counselling center.

These online sessions can help you deal with sadness, anger, or worry. The counsellor listens, gives advice, and enables you to figure out how to handle things. They can even provide tips on talking to your ex-partner, especially when sorting out stuff for your kids.

Online counselling can be one-on-one or in groups. Sometimes, talking with others going through the same thing can make you feel less alone. It's flexible, too - you can have sessions at different times, which is excellent if you have a tight schedule.

Benefits of Online Divorce Counselling

Online divorce counselling offers several benefits, including:

  • Convenience: Online counselling allows couples to meet with a therapist at a time and location that is convenient for them.
  • Affordability: Online counselling is typically less expensive than traditional in-person counselling.
  • Access to a broader range of therapists: Online counselling gives couples access to a more comprehensive range of therapists than they may have access to in their local area.

High-Conflict Divorce Counselling

High-conflict divorce in Ontario is when separating couples have a lot of disagreements and hard feelings. It's more than just arguing over who gets the coffee maker. We're talking about serious fights, money, who gets the house, or where the kids will live. In these divorces, emotions run high. People might feel outraged, hurt, or scared. These feelings can make it hard to agree on anything.


High-conflict divorce counselling is a special kind of help for people going through a really tough divorce. It's for when the arguments are big and don't seem to stop. This counselling is like having a referee who helps both people talk without fighting. The counsellor is trained to deal with big emotions and tricky situations. They help each person feel heard and work on fair solutions. They also give tools to handle stress and anger better, which is essential, especially if kids are involved.

This type of counselling can happen in person or online. It's all about creating a space where both people can say what they need to without becoming a big fight. It's not always easy, but it can make a challenging situation more manageable.

Benefits of High-Conflict Divorce Counselling

High-conflict divorce counselling can help couples to:

  • Develop more effective communication skills
  • Manage their anger and emotions
  • Learn to co-parent effectively
  • Reach agreements on the terms of their divorce

Benefits of Collaborative Divorce Counselling

Collaborative divorce counselling (CDC) is a team-based approach to divorce. In a collaborative divorce, the couple and their lawyers work together to reach an agreement on the terms of their divorce.

It is a relatively new approach to divorce that is gaining popularity in Ontario. CDC is a team-based approach to divorce that involves the couple, their lawyers, and other professionals, such as a financial advisor and a child specialist. The goal of CDC is to help the couple reach a mutually agreeable settlement without going to court.

How Collaborative Divorce Counselling Works

CDC typically begins with a joint meeting of the couple, their lawyers, and the other professionals. At this meeting, the couple will discuss their goals for the divorce, and the process will be explained. The team will then work together to develop a settlement plan.

The CDC process typically involves several meetings between the couple and their team. During these meetings, the couple will discuss their assets and debts, child custody and access, and spousal support. The team will help the couple understand their options and develop a fair settlement.

Benefits of Collaborative Divorce Counselling

CDC offers many advantages over traditional divorce litigation, including:

  • Reduced conflict and stress: CDC is a more collaborative approach to divorce than traditional litigation. This can help to reduce conflict and stress for the couple and their children.
  • More control over the outcome: In CDC, the couple controls the terms of their divorce agreement. This is in contrast to a court-ordered divorce, where a judge will make decisions on behalf of the couple.
  • Lower costs: CDC is typically less expensive than traditional divorce litigation.
  • Faster resolution: CDC can often help couples resolve their divorce more quickly than traditional divorce litigation.

Tying in Uncontested Divorce

An uncontested divorce is when both spouses agree on all the significant issues, like property division, child custody, and spousal support. It's usually quicker and less expensive than a contested divorce, where spouses can't agree and need a judge to decide.

Divorce counselling can be a big help in an uncontested divorce. It offers a space to discuss feelings of sadness, anxiety, or uncertainty about the future. A counsellor can provide strategies for coping with these emotions and moving forward. Counselling also helps with communication. Even in an uncontested divorce, communicating effectively is essential, especially if children are involved. A counsellor can teach you ways to talk to each other respectfully and productively.

So, while an uncontested divorce might seem straightforward, divorce counselling can still play a valuable role. It supports both spouses through the emotional aspects of ending a marriage. It helps lay the foundation for a positive post-divorce relationship, especially in co-parenting situations.

Preparing for Co-Parenting: Essential Counselling Considerations

Co-parenting counselling is a type of counselling that can help couples who are divorced or separated to co-parent their children effectively. Co-parenting counselling can help couples to:

  • Develop a co-parenting plan
  • Communicate effectively with each other about their children
  • Resolve conflict peacefully
  • Support their children's emotional well-being

Benefits of Co-Parenting Counselling

Co-parenting counselling in Ontario offers lots of benefits, especially after a divorce. It helps parents work together for their kids' good, even when they're no longer together. The counsellor teaches ways to communicate without arguing, making deciding things about the kids easier.


This kind of counselling also helps parents see things from their kids' point of view. It ensures the kids don't get stuck in the middle of adult issues. Parents learn to support their kids through the changes and keep their routines regular.


Another big plus is that it reduces stress for everyone. When parents get along better, it's easier for the kids, too. They feel more secure and settled. Co-parenting counselling is an excellent tool for making life after divorce smoother for the whole family.


Divorce Groups

Divorce groups are support communities, often found in Ontario, where people going through a divorce can share their experiences. These groups provide a safe space to talk about the challenges and emotions of going through a divorce. They're essential because they help people feel less alone. Members can learn from each other, get practical advice, and find emotional support from others who understand what they're going through. Being part of a divorce group can offer a sense of community and understanding, which can be incredibly comforting and helpful during such a transformative and often challenging time.

Benefits of Divorce Groups

Divorce groups offer numerous advantages, including:

  • Emotional support: Divorce groups can provide emotional support to people going through a divorce.
  • Practical advice: Divorce groups can give practical advice on child custody, spousal support, and financial planning.
  • Connection: Divorce groups can help people connect with others going through similar experiences.

How to Choose a Divorce Mediator

When choosing a divorce mediator, it is crucial to consider the following factors:

  • Experience: The mediator should have experience in mediating divorces.
  • Qualifications: The mediator should have the necessary training and qualifications.
  • Impartiality: The mediator should be impartial and neutral.
  • Reputation: Check their reputation through reviews or referrals.
  • Communication skills: The mediator should communicate effectively with the couple.
  • Personal rapport: The couple should feel comfortable with the mediator.
  • Approach: Ensure their approach aligns with your needs, whether it's collaborative or more assertive.
  • Availability: They should be readily available to address your concerns.
  • Cost: Understand their fee structure and ensure it fits your budget.

Conclusion

Divorce can be a complex and challenging experience. However, divorce counselling and mediation can help couples navigate the emotional and legal landscape of divorce with clarity and confidence. They offer tools for better communication, emotional coping, and amicable resolution, especially in co-parenting arrangements. Embracing these resources can transform a potentially problematic experience into an opportunity for growth and new beginnings. We have over 30 years of experience specializing in divorce mediation at Tabuchi Law. Remember, seeking the proper support can make a significant difference in transitioning smoothly to the next chapter of your life. 


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Disclaimer
The information provided on this blog is intended for general knowledge and informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. The content on this blog is not a substitute for professional legal advice tailored to your specific circumstances. Laws and regulations are constantly changing, and the information provided on this blog may not be current or accurate. We make no representations or warranties of any kind, express or implied, about the completeness, accuracy, reliability, suitability, or availability of the information contained in this blog. For specific legal advice regarding your situation, we strongly recommend that you consult with our firm or another qualified legal professional. Do not rely on information found on this blog as a substitute for personalized legal advice.

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Information is power!

The Ultimate Guide to Estate Planning in Ontario
Estate Planning
5 min read

The Ultimate Guide to Estate Planning in Ontario

Why is estate planning important?

Estate planning is the process of managing your assets during your lifetime and after your death. It involves creating a plan to ensure that your assets are distributed according to your wishes and that your loved ones are taken care of after you are gone.

Estate planning is important for everyone, regardless of age, wealth, or marital status. It can help you to:

  • Avoid probate, which is a time-consuming and expensive legal process that distributes your assets after your death.
  • Protect your assets from creditors and lawsuits.
  • Ensure that your assets are distributed to your desired beneficiaries in the way that you want.
  • Minimize estate taxes.
  • Provide for your minor children and other dependents.
  • Make your wishes known for your end-of-life care.

What is probate?

Probate is the legal process of distributing a deceased person's assets. It involves proving the validity of the deceased's will and appointing an executor to carry out the wishes of the deceased.

Probate can be a complex and time-consuming process, and it can also be expensive. The probate fees charged by the courts vary from province to province, but they are typically based on the value of the deceased's estate.

How to avoid probate

There are a number of ways to avoid probate, including:

  • Living trusts: A living trust is a legal document that transfers ownership of your assets to a trustee. The trustee will manage your assets during your lifetime and distribute them to your beneficiaries after your death. Living trusts are a complex estate planning tool, so it is important to speak to an estate planning lawyer to determine if a living trust is right for you.
  • Joint ownership: Joint ownership is a type of ownership where two or more people own the same asset. When one joint owner dies, their interest in the asset automatically passes to the other joint owners. Joint ownership can be a simple and effective way to avoid probate for certain assets, such as bank accounts and real estate. However, it is important to understand the rights and responsibilities of joint ownership before transferring assets to joint ownership.
  • Beneficiary designations: Beneficiary designations allow you to specify who will receive certain assets after your death, such as insurance policies, retirement accounts, and bank accounts. Assets with beneficiary designations are not subject to probate.

Other estate planning tools

In addition to living trusts, joint ownership, and beneficiary designations, there are a number of other estate planning tools that can be used to avoid probate and protect your assets. These tools include:

  • Powers of attorney: A power of attorney is a legal document that gives another person the authority to act on your behalf. You can create a power of attorney for financial matters or for healthcare matters. A power of attorney can be helpful if you become incapacitated and are unable to manage your own affairs.
  • Guardianships: If you have minor children, you will need to appoint a guardian to care for them after your death. You can appoint a guardian in your will.
  • Wills: A will is a legal document that specifies how you want your assets to be distributed after your death. If you die without a will, your assets will be distributed according to the laws of intestacy in your province.

Benefits of estate planning

Estate planning offers a number of benefits, including:

  • Peace of mind: Knowing that your affairs are in order and that your loved ones will be taken care of after you are gone can give you peace of mind.
  • Reduced legal costs and delays: Probate can be a time-consuming and expensive process. Estate planning can help to reduce legal costs and delays by avoiding probate.
  • Asset protection: Estate planning can help to protect your assets from creditors and lawsuits.
  • Tax minimization: Estate planning can help to minimize estate taxes.
  • Family protection: Estate planning can help to ensure that your assets are distributed to your desired beneficiaries in the way that you want.
  • End-of-life care: Estate planning can help to make your wishes known for your end-of-life care.

How to get started with estate planning

The first step in estate planning is to gather your information. This includes making a list of your assets, debts, and beneficiaries. You should also think about your end-of-life care wishes.

Once you have gathered your information, you can start to create your estate plan. It is important to speak to an estate planning lawyer to get help creating an estate plan that meets your individual needs.

Hire an estate planning lawyer

An estate planning lawyer can help you to:

  • Understand your estate planning options
  • Create an estate plan that meets your individual needs
  • Review your estate plan regularly to ensure that it is up-to-date

Gather your information

Before you meet with an estate planning lawyer, it is important to gather your information. This includes making a list of your assets, debts, and beneficiaries. You should also think about your end-of-life care wishes.

Create your estate plan

Once you have gathered your information, you can start to create your estate plan. This may involve creating a will, a living trust, and other estate planning documents. It is important to work with an estate planning lawyer to create an estate plan that meets your individual needs.

Review and update your estate plan regularly

Your estate plan should be reviewed and updated regularly to ensure that it is up-to-date and that it reflects your current wishes. It is especially important to review your estate plan after major life events, such as marriage, divorce, or the birth of a child.

Example of how estate planning can avoid probate

Here is an example of how estate planning can avoid probate:

John and Mary are married and have two children. They own a home, a bank account, and a retirement account. John and Mary want to ensure that their assets pass smoothly to their children after they die.

John and Mary create a living trust and transfer their home and bank account to the trust. They also name their children as the beneficiaries of their retirement account.

John dies, and Mary inherits his interest in the living trust. After Mary dies, the assets in the living trust are distributed to their children.

Because John and Mary's assets were held in a living trust, they avoided probate. This saved their children time and money.

Conclusion

Estate planning is an important part of financial planning. It can help you to protect your assets, ensure that your wishes are carried out after you are gone, and reduce the burden on your loved ones. If you have not already done so, I encourage you to speak to an estate planning lawyer to get started with your estate plan.

Ontario Estate Planning: Understanding Non-Probate Assets
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Ontario Estate Planning: Understanding Non-Probate Assets

When a person dies without a will, their assets are distributed according to Ontario's intestacy rules. However, certain assets, such as jointly owned property and life insurance policies with named beneficiaries, are excluded from intestacy distribution. Understanding these exclusions is important for estate planning.